Horror fans know that in order to survive, we have to follow certain rules. No drinking, no drugs, and definitely no sex. The film Don’t Fuck in the Woods takes that last rule and drives it home… in the most graphic of ways.

The film opens with a couple doing exactly what the title insists we don’t do- fucking in the woods. It’s all fun and games until the two get brutally slaughtered by a creature. As the story continues, we meet a group of friends who celebrate their college graduation with a camping trip in the woods. It isn’t long before the group starts meeting the same fate as the couple.Now, it’s obvious that there will, indeed, be sex in the film, but that’s simplifying things. The sex here is extremely graphic, especially compared to the typical “teens hooking up in the woods” scenes featured in films like Friday the 13th. I’m not putting this out there as a negative. Sex and horror go hand in hand, and Don’t Fuck in the Woods handles the scenes impressively well.

I have to admit that I expected the film to be on the cheesy side, but it took itself more seriously. The dialogue was natural, the couples and friends had great chemistry, and the creature was actually scary. Don’t Fuck in the Woods features some great practical effects, complete with organs ripped out and lots of blood splatter. The creature was also done practically, with no use of CGI that I could tell. I’m not sure if the creature would hold up in brighter light, but for the woods scenes, it looked great. A few of the actors were noticeably a bit more amateur, but it was easy to overlook. I thoroughly enjoyed the script, which was written by director Shawn Burkett. It was crude, but not too over the top so that it wasn’t believable. An absolute standout performance for me was actress Brittany Blanton in the role of Jane. She stole every scene she was in and could absolutely go on to grab the title of “scream queen” in indie horror.

Overall, Don’t Fuck in the Woods was well executed, gets bonus points for going practical, and is a great addition to the creature sub-genre.

Don't Fuck in the Woods (2016)
I'm the owner and editor-in-chief of Horror Geek Life! I'm a sucker for cheesy horror, a Fallout addict, and collect way too many comics. I'm also honored to be a film judge at the 2018 Women in Horror Film Festival.

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