Much like Halloween, Christmas is a month-long celebration. Now that we’re a few days removed from Thanksgiving, the holly jolly holiday season is upon us. Those that celebrate the event have likely started cramming their houses and yards full of lights and Santa Claus decorations, whether it be for their own personal joy or simply to outdo their neighbors. If you’ve yet to begin the process, you’re in luck.. you can still be saved.

We know you want to be the best, and oftentimes that entails buying a chopped down tree, or even chopping it down yourself. DON’T DO IT. If you intend to survive the holiday, shop for fake trees this Christmas season. Not only will you save yourself the trouble of sappy hands and a pine-scented migraine, you will also fare better than most when the trees have their revenge.

Don’t be like this person. Buy a plastic tree.

This is evidenced in the 2008 short film, Treevenge, which may or may not be based on actual events. Directed by Jason Eisener, who is best known for Hobo with a Shotgun, the high-concept horror short depicts Christmas from the perspective of trees that were chopped down and shipped to the various homes of those celebrating the holiday. Little do the humans know that the trees take offense to the humiliation of being forced into their living rooms and decorated to their liking. So much offense, in fact, that they massacre and kill an entire town.

From the moment that the Cannibal Holocaust theme starts playing during the opening title sequence, you know that you’re in for an absurd, bloody holiday treat. So, rather than testing luck with a real tree, stay home this holiday season and enjoy this cautionary tale from the comfort of your couch with a lovely, safe, non-living plastic tree in the corner of your living room.

Don’t say we didn’t warn you.

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I love writing and I'm an avid film watcher, dating back to my horror-filled childhood. I'm a lover of cheese, both in cinema and edible form. Connect with me on Facebook & Twitter and let's talk horror!


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